Intrusive thoughts

Ah yes, intrusive thoughts.

I find this very interesting.

I've had intrusive thoughts since... I don't know when. A long long time ago.

There are two kinds of intrusive thoughts (to me, at least.)

The first type is kinda funny.

One consistent one is when I take a shower, right, sometimes I'd write names on the fogged up glass. I used to write Harry Styles onto it. And then, I think to myself, I have to wipe away all of it with my hand in one go. If I fail, I'm never gonna meet Harry Styles. Dumb stuff like that. Or when I'm walking, I'll be like: I have to reach that lamppost before that bus or else I'll fail all my exams. I dunno. Weird stuff.

Another type is... violent and scary thoughts.

Like when look out the window in a building, I'll think about what it feels like to fall to my death. (I think I've mentioned this in a pervious post, but I didn't know they were actually a thing at the time. I only knew after Brooklyn and I had a conversation about it). Or sometimes, I think about smashing things, breaking my glasses, dropping something that should not be dropped, stabbing myself, eating something inedible. Obviously, I don't actually want to do any of those things. I just... think about them.

And apparently, and fortunately, they're very much normal:D A lot of people have had them. I find this so interesting though.

Sparky x